happy & satisfied VS worried

before i start, THANKS to those who have spoken to me these past few days....you know who you are.....nostalgic memories...*sorry* i only have these few pix in my lap top*


ok.....i dunno what to feel....

i am suppose to study, which i did BUT at the same time, am watching series!

yes, and for those of you who knows my history of being glued to the tv during the kiddy days and also secondary school days, am not sure if i am back to my old self. i lost that identity last year when i was in college kl, cos there was no tv to watch and not much source of series.

NOW....hum hum hum, maybe having a constant internet line is not so good after all, as i can watch series after series non stop....of course, i am studying when i do that.

i dunno whether i should feel happy and satisfied or worried. my old self is back,doing homework during commercial breaks and studying in front of the tv, eliminating the stressful feeling, and also helping me to feel guilty if i watch too much and so making me feel focus.

or should i be worried cos i haven stopped doing this for the past year and i wonder how much i studied actually gets into my head.

watever it is, i know in future when i am bored, or at least feeling disconnected and not belonged, i have a home to turn to - my room = my bed, my skype, my series.....

end? beginning?

last day was my last day of uni for sem 1 year 1. and i need not mention how time flies soooo fast again. it just seems like i just blogged about my arrival in singapore and my nursing ori camp, trying to get used to this new home.

despite the ups and downs, emotional rages that i had, theres nothing i can dwell bout it but really just live thru each day to the fullest. am sure most of you all would agree me in this, life has just got to go on, no matter how crappy your life is.

andso for the next week, its reading week. my first paper starts on fri with smelly engligh, and sat anatomy. monday ethics and law, wed contem nursing, thurs physiology and fri last but not least professional issues and practices.

really hope i can focus on my studies now and not think think think, let others affect me and also series!!! hehe.

and after my exams, i seriously owe lots of ppl time, haven been spending time with my frens and most importantly our dear old school mate chris!! hang in there chris, before i pass you my greys. and also time with the rest of all of you, very very delayed emails and phone calls.

cant wait to go back kuching and meet up with everyone.

its not that i am homesick or wat, but i tot the 'home' that i have established here in singapore, nus, i am beginning to lose it.....explains my last post song on home from michael buble.

all i ask is very simple for home. a place where i truly feel belonged, connected and among understanding ppl. and most importantly, the sense of security. am sure you all would know my history of insecurit. i once tot i had alreday here in.....but am beginning to lose it and i really just wanna go home. thats why i really cant wait to go back kuching, home where my frens are all there.

sorry ppl for not being up to date. will catch up with you guys soon. and those of you who are going to drop by singapore for transit of hols.....let me know. am gonna be here till dec 27....spending lonely xmas here.

study hard for those who are sitting for exams and those over already, enjoy, relax and have fun!!

another summer day
has come and gone away

maybe surrounded by
a million people i
still feel all alone
i just wanna go home

-------------------

solo en el corazon

para el amor, la esperanza, la compania y la felicidad; quien voy

wats with me?

i finally did my laundry and iron ALL my clothes which has been sitting in my cupboard for days!!!

and i did try to cook!!

wat else, oh tony blair's lecture. it was an experience listening to a real politician talk....but i guess above all, the best part is after the lecture.....WINE AND FINGER FOOD.....from shangrilla.

now back to the real student world....START STUDYING!!!

good luck everyone in your tests/assignments/exams


i just cant seem to blog my feelings out now....weird......i tot i could do that since i cant talk now

happy deepavali!!

ppiiixxxx - SEOUL GARDEN ORCHARD
(ME, CHANG MEI, CHRISTINE, CHI KUAN, SU EE)
(HSIEN LENG, BRANDON, MING HAN)

the last time i blogged was just after my recess week. and now, its a week before uni officially ends. oct, and now nov. again i need not mention, SOO FAST!!

just had a grueling week. and thie weekend, is gonna be a long break, pause for me to rest and catch up with things slowly. yep yep yep, i know finals is less than OMG, 2 weeks?? i never realised that. but i really need to slow down after my ethics and law essay, pip presentation and also anatomy ca, all happening in one shot. next week still got skills lab for transfering. yep, i definitely need to slow down this weekend. not to mention, recuperate to build a stronger inner self...since the past 2 weeks have been really emotionally and mentally drainin.

i am worried, because i am not worried bout my studies!! ARGHHHH...feels like my mind are more occupied with frens, ppl, my surroundings. and that kinda sucks cos i am suppose to be thinking bout studies. its weird, that i feel tired, drained out not because of studies but more to ppl. am sure you know how worried i can get but this time round, i felt that i am doing fine with my studies tho i am not the top of the top but i am not so concerned bout it which worries me now. and really, ppl is also not a good mind thinking factor. its really drains you out and i must say my feelings are controlling my life and thats a big NO NO to anyones life, just like wat my lecturer used to mentioN

oh well, now i just gotta learn to control. this week, definitely a slow down for me, nevertheless, activities, outings are still on and definitely STUDIES. no more time but taking it slowly.

late going bugis to celebrate for presentation with my grp after the hard work we put in. also a relaxationperiod for all us after the hectic schedule that we had.

tomorrow gonna be in tony blair's lecture...hopefully its not gonna be boring.